I've been looking for a new job for some time now. Goodness knows, I enjoy a bit of slack time during the working day to catch up on personal emails, same as most people, but there is a happy balance between having a bit of slack time and having nothing to do.
A typical day goes something like this :
8.30am Arrive at work. Switch on computer, go and make a cup of coffee while the computer is warming up. Marvel at how someone as intelligent as the director who was making coffee before me has not yet mastered the art of putting the electric kettle back on its base-plate, nor of returning the milk to the fridge. Return milk to fridge. Return to desk.
8.35am Check Hotmail account to see if any personal emails have arrived since I logged off around midnight last night at home. Nope. Check office emails to see if any have arrived since I left yesterday at 5pm. Nope.
8.40am Check office answerphone in case messages have been left. Yes! One! An elderly lady's voice quavers , 'Can the doctor bring my prescription, please? Thank you.' It's a wrong number. I am often tempted to give medical advice over the telephone because we frequently get calls for a local surgery, but the callers are often confused and, however I may be feeling, I can't bring myself to sacrifice their health on the altar of my boredom.
8.45am Coffee still too hot: I blow on it gently and start a game of Spider Solitaire. Get bored and stare out of the window.
9.30am Post arrives! Chat briefly with the lovely postman (looks like a vampire, all long black hair, hypnotic eyes, wide smile and very prominent canine teeth. Could be fangs.) Sort and distribute post.
9.40am Stare out of the window some more.
Of course, the whole day isn't spent staring out of the window. Sometimes people come in to tell me that the toilet on the landing isn't working (don't they know how the flush operates?) or that a neon tube has blown in their office. I call Estates and Facilities and ask them to fix it ... and go back to staring out of the window.
Occasionally one of the managers comes in and talks to me slowly, in words of one syllable. She wants me to arrange a meeting, but maybe we should have a meeting first to discuss how to arrange the meeting? I humour her and schedule a meeting. At that meeting she says, very slowly, 'Now, the first thing we need to do is check people's d I a r I e s to see when they are free.'
Ye gods! I've been a top PA for about 25 years. I go back to the office and bang my head slowly and heavily against the inside of the closed door. A few minutes later someone comes in to report a banging noise. Could I call Estates & Facilities to get someone out to check it?
So you see, I simply have to find a new job soon, before my brain turns to tapioca, semolina, porridge, or something else equally stodgy.
The job-hunt continues and tomorrow I have yet another interview. There is already a saga to that one, but for another day. I will keep you updated!
