Incommunicado ...

As I usually do before going to bed, I sat at my computer to check for any late emails. Talk Talk flashed up the helpful message, 'It looks as if you are having problems connecting to your Broadband.' I followed all the usual steps (Talk Talk 'loses' my connection on a fairly regular basis) and, when that didn't resolve it, I rebooted. That normally clears it. In fact, ring your office helpdesk, wherever you are in the country, and the chances are that you'll be advised to switch off and switch on again. Having booted up, Talk Talk flashed again, 'We have detected a problem with your broadband connection.'

This was about 11pm on Friday. I followed the steps, I logged on and off, I followed different steps, logged on and off again, in short, I would not be beaten! Eventually, at 4.30am on Saturday morning I had to admit defeat and I went to bed.

Later that same morning, I left a pitiful voicemail on a friend's 'phone - 'lucky' woman uses Talk Talk as well - explaining the problem, and she 'phoned back with a solution! Not the quick/easy/cheap one I was hoping for, but a solution nevertheless! Apparently, Talk Talk has been upgrading their service, area by area, and since the upgrade, the wireless router that was sent out to new members last year is no longer compatible. Of course, they didn't acknowledge this themselves, my friend's partner managed to find out the information on the internet and my friend's solution was to buy a new router. She's had no problem since.

My problem is that a) I can't afford a new router and b) if I could, PC World have had such a run on the particular type I need that they have sold out, presumably to disgruntled Talk Talk customers.

'Check the internet for fixes in one of the nerd forums,' my brother helpfully suggested. I would if I could connect to the internet ... (well, I know I'm connected at the moment because I'm posting this, but there is a limit to how much time I can spend on personal stuff at work!) ... and if I understood nerd-speak. I am fluent in French, I have a smattering of German, but geek is all greek to me.

So tonight I have the prospect of wading through pages of nerd-ese that I've sneakily printed off at work, and talking to the lovely people at the Talk Talk helpdesk who, according to the friend who had the same problem, could be prosecuted under the Trades Descriptions Act for their lack of help. They couldn't understand what was wrong in the first place, much less suggest a solution.

When/if my internet connection gets back and running I think my first Google search will be for wig manufacturers, because by then I shall have torn all my hair out ...

Wish me luck!